If you’re reading this, it means I’m still alive and somewhat dangling on the verge of insanity. I’ve been infected with motherhood, and the battle has been a tough one.

The symptoms: heightened levels of anxiety, occasional depression, plain old lack of enthusiasm to do most things and extreme obsession with a tiny human.

The cure? None discovered to date. Just kidding: Wine.

As I drink my magic potion, I’ve come to decide that I shall be a fabulous mom.

I know it takes a lot of work, and it isn’t worth it (because I don’t really go anywhere these days), but I’m going to do it for my sanity.

The only issue is my brand new mom bod is getting in the way. And since my other symptoms and wine are currently hindering my weight-loss, I’ve begun to embrace the more-to-love-look: #bodypositive!

Maybe I will even vaguely attempt to become a plus-size model and get discovered through Instagram.

This will give me an excuse to get dressed almost everyday (even without an occasion) and have something to do so I don’t lose my mind…. Waddaya think? I have a lot of time on my hands, boys and girls. And as the saying goes, dress for the job you want, not the one ya have! ✌